I am currently sitting on a bus on my way back to Fairfax from Homestead Virginia. The George Mason University Chorale was asked to perform at this year’s VMEA (Virginia Music Educators Association) convention, which is considered an honor says Dr. Billingham. I have never been to VMEA, but I have decided I do want to go next year to look into all the material and options it has (also lots of free samples!). Of course this means I need to join CMENC, since they arrange the trip every year. Our performance went well even though I almost fell off the back of the raisers, Christine luckily saw my hand reaching out and prevented me from falling back in the middle of our song Celebrate.
I unfortunately missed the cheerleading sleepover last night because I was on this trip, but I hope the girls had fun regardless. Sitting on the bus for a couple hours has my thoughts wonder to many things in my life and in the world in general, so this post might turn into a philosophical one, but its whatever so yeah.
Despite some of the weak moments I had in the beginning of the semester when I was not sure of anything from my direction in life to how I was going to survive it all I feel I have learned a lot about myself this semester, probably more so then last semester when I felt everything crumble around me. I seem to amaze myself from time to time. I am stronger then I thought, but at the same time I am still vulnerable in many ways, and I don’t think I will ever be rid of it or if I every truly want to be. I have so much compassion and caring for people that even though I am told from time to time that I care too much I don’t really believe there is such a thing. I feel humans in general care too little. We are so concerned about our own and ourselves that we forget to show compassion toward those the need it and when they need it the most. I want to make a difference not just pass through this life selfishly gaining for myself. I’m only twenty but I feel you can make a difference even if its one person at a time. One event or meeting one person can drastically change someone’s life so why not work towards making it for the better? I am so thankful for my life and everyone it that I know some are not as lucky as me. I just hope that this holiday season is better then last year and that I do not feel the emptiness that I felt as I was visiting the family that I grew up with. Here is to surviving the end of this semester and having the courage to survive Sean graduating and possibly going far away.
